Sunday dress code for church (boys and men only)

I think that making an effort to dress for church indicates some sort of respect for God and for the Church. Going to Mass on Sunday should be the main event of the week and I find myself appalled by people who turn up in the sort of casual wear that suggests they're squeezing in Mass between their weekly shopping and digging the garden afterwards. I don't expect everyone to put on a suit and tie anymore (although I do) but coming in the sort of clothes you put on when your not doing anything special suggests to me people think the same thing about coming to Mass. People dress up for parties with friends and celebration meals but think nothing of coming to celebrate Mass wearing dress down clothes. I always wear a suit and tie to Church and make sure my son also dresses smartly. For midweek Masses we're a bit more casual but still make an effort and for my son's church study group I make him wear a collar and tie (though he's the only one who does). I would never wear shorts to Church and my son is now too old to do so, though I do still keep him in them at home. I'm sure God doesn't care what you wear but I think that making an effort shows you are planning and preparing for Mass and not just treating it casually.

Yes, malcham, I quite agree with you, Sunday Mass is the most important event of the week, and it is a great festivity that should be solemnized by dressing up ! God cares for the effort you make, one should just be careful not dress up just to be seen by others ! If your nice tie and dress shirt are hidden under your overcoat, nobody except God and yourself knows that you are wearing them...

You are perfectly right to ask your son to dress up also, and wear collar and tie for church. Does he agree and like beeing smart ? If you keep him with shorts at home, I think he could also wear dress shorts and kneesocks for Church at least in summer. How old is he ?

I agree that dressing up for the sake of being seen to dress up would be quite wrong, but dressing up as a way of showing your respect for the your church and for God is something I would like to see more of. People dress up for job interviews and for weddings. I think it's quite sad that they feel that attendance at Mass is so inconsequential that they can't be bothered to make more of an effort.

My son is 15 and I think if left to his own choice would wear the same saggy, baggy casual clothes as other 15 year olds, though I think he does appreciate that making some sort of effort for attendance at Mass is important even if it's not so formal as a I like him to be. I'm not against the idea of him wearing formal shorts but I think that it would be something of a weekly battle and distraction. For the daytime prayer and religious study group he attends during school holiday periods shorts are OK but this obviously less formal.

Malcham, a slightly tangential point but granted that your son quite rightly goes to Mass and a study group, OI wondered if you made sure he goes to confession regularly, and properly dressed, I ask because in my family my father has had problems recently with my 16 year old brother trying to get of regular confession and it causes some problems. Thanks, Mark.

Hi Mark

Sorry for the late reply (only a year!) Not sure if the problem has been solved. How regular is regular? I go to confession with my son once a month although I know he also goes at other times if he feels he has something which he needs to confess and I have, occassionally told him to go to confession if he's been very badly behaved or disobedient. It's never been a major issue as I think he appreciates the 'feel good factor' that comes from going to confession and completing a penance (as I do). There have been a couple of times I've told him to go and he hasn't and I've had to discipline him but it's not a big issue. In terms of being properly dressed I've always felt strongly that confession is a sacrament, not just a chat, and that some degree of preparation and seriousness is required and that making sure you are appropriately dressed is part of that preparation.