spanking teens

I am a parent of a 12 year old boy. Normally I do not spank my son but this one time it needed in a bad way.

I was driving home from work one day when I saw this car pull up in front of my house, my son got out and went into the house. I spoke with the driver whom I did not know and it turns out he did not know my son either but happen to see him walking in the rain and offered him a ride home.

I went into the house and asked my son who gave him the ride. First he said that he did not get out of the car but he spoke with the driver here, I saw him get out so I told him. He changed his story to tell me that it was a friends dad. He stuck to that story until I confronted him as to what the driver said. After a bit of figiting he finally caved in and admitted that it was a stranger as he was late at school for a program, I was so upset. After a few minutes of talk he admitted doing it a few times, I was feaked out. I have explained to him since he was very little about strangers so he knows. He did not get the point and did not understand my fuss, I sent him to his room and made him put his pj's on at 6:30pm.

My issues are he got into strangers car, bold faced lied to me twice about it, and did not seem to get the fact of danger.

This is where I went to his room with a paddle. I felt I had no choice but to take this serious. I was very discreet but i did manage to get him over my knee and pull his pjs down only at the back just enough to expose his bare bottom and despite some good wiggling I managed to get 5 good whack on his rear end. Of course he did not like that at all. I left him bawling on his bed, of course he hates me.

About 1 hour later I went back to his room and he settled and we spoke. I was able to get the message through to him. He said he now realizes he did a very bad thing and though he did not like it he said he deserved it.

That night I could not sleep so good as I hated spanking him but I had to.

Comments?

I spoke with a few friends whom shared the same idea of not spanking or at least not too often. Many have said that they are at wits end as to how to correct their child's behaviour since the normal grounding does not always have any effect. After much talk with friends I have some advice for parents who are thinking about spanking their kids.

Spanking is only effective if it is done very rarely, last resort. If you spank your kids too often then they will learn that it is not all that bad and that they will live through it and the fear factor is gone. Also over spanking will lead to anger issues in that child down the road.

Spanking should never be done when your at your angriest moment, you lose control of how hard and how many times you hit, better to cool off first.

Spanking should be done in a very loving way, hard to imagine this, but yes a loving way. It should never be done out of revenge for what your child has done. It should only be done as a tool to correct unwanted behaviour and provide consequences for their actions.

Spanking should be very a private matter between the spanker and child and should never be talked about to anyone else, even siblings.

Spanking should be quick and to the pointand make no fuss.

Discretion should be shown towards the child, better if father spanks boy and mother spanks girl. if this is not possible use discrestion.

The child should be turned over the knees of the parent trying to keep their confort in mind, the pants and under pants should be lowered at the back only and just below the bottom of the bum just enough to expose the bum cheeks. It should be noted that most kids will not sit still. With either the hand or a belt or a hair brush strike the childs bottom with substantial force, enough so the child feels it quite well. If the spank is well placed and with good force the child will react right away, he will not like that at all and then you will have to restrain him to continue as he will what he can to get away, be carefull as you go to spank again that he has not moved and your aim has to be well placed on his bum only. 3-5 well place spanks accross his bare bum should be enough to get your point accross. By the time you are done he will be bawling his eyes out. he will probably say he hates you and such you need to ignore this. Once the spanking is done leave the child alone in his room for a period of time to allow him to calm down. Once he is calm go back and if he is ready have a serious talk with him about happend and allow him to express his feelings towards the spanking and his behaviour.

All children know that they do bad things, they expect to be punished and even know they deserve it, they many not wany it but the know they need it.

As far as the age goes for spanking that depends on the child. If you feel the onyl way to get through to a 16 year old is turing him over your knee and tanning his hide then fine but that willbe very hard. Even the most coperative child will be hard. If the kid willingly lies over your knee you can be assured that once he gets a vert well placed whack on the bare bum with say a hair brush he will not be so willing to just lye there.

I want to hear from teenagers and anyone about their views on spanking especially about spanking teeangers. I am not so sure it is right after 12 though.

A little funny thing a buddy told me.

Last year he has to spank his then 11 year old boy for stealing, I will add stealing for the 3rd time in a month.

Anyway when the boy was lying over my friends knee it was pushing on his tummy which is expected. When he started to spank his son it turned out he had a full bladder and had to pee very badly but did not say anything. With the pressure on his tummy area with him over the knee and the sudden whack on his rear end the boy peed all over my friend druing the spanking, didn't get noticed until done. No he did not spank him more cause pf the peeing he just realized he should have got him to pee before spanking.

Moral: Make sure your kids pee before you spank them.

I am an adult girl 19 years old. I am still spanked at home very often. So, don't hesitate to bare his bum and to spank him at least 10 min. He deserved it, I knew.

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