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Jury awards $4M to Missouri transgender student who sued school district for discrimination

New York Daily News

A jury in Jackson County, Mo. has awarded more than $4 million to a transgender student who sued the Blue Springs school district for discrimination in 2015.

According to KSHB-TV, the plaintiff, who’s now a former student of Delta Woods Middle School and the Freshman Center, said that he was denied access to the boy’s restrooms and locker rooms even after amending his birth certificate.

He legally changed his name in 2010 and amended his documents four years later.

However, even after that, the defendants continued to deny the teen “access to the boys’ restrooms and locker rooms even though he is recognized as a boy under the laws of the state of Missouri,” the court document said.

When participating in school sports in middle school, he was required to use a single-person restroom, the lawsuit stated.

During his 2014-2015 school year at the Freshman Center, he “chose not to participate in fall sports … due to being denied access to the boys’ locker room and restrooms,” according to court documents.

The boy, who felt singled out because of his exclusion, sued the school district for sex discrimination in 2015. On Monday, the jury found that the district had discriminated against him.

According to FOX 4 Kansas City, the jury awarded the former student $4 million in punitive damages, as well as $175,000 in compensatory damages.

The district released a statement saying that it “disagrees with the verdict and will be seeking appropriate relief from the trial court and court of appeals if necessary.”

DEAR ABBY: My grandson, his girlfriend and, recently, my son (who had to move in) are living with me. He is the only one working. My grandson has been sitting on his butt for the last 2 1/2 years and does minimal work here in my home. All three of these "adults" live here for free. I am 79 and on a fixed income. I pay for everything.

They were supposed to be saving money so they could get a place of their own. That's a big joke. All they do is spend, spend, spend. They sleep all day and play games on their computers all night. I have seriously considered shutting off the internet (which I pay for) to see what they would do.

I have been talking to a counselor due to my stress and anger issues. The counselor has strongly advised me to evict them. My daughter told me if I do, I'll never see her or my two young grandchildren again. She means it.

I'm tired of being the caregiver. I feel used, but can't set boundaries very well. I'm also afraid of my 24-year-old grandson, who has terrible anger issues and who put his fist through a wall when I called him lazy. Should I put them out, or, to keep peace in the family. continue to let them use me? - USED UP

DEAR USED UP: There will never be peace in your family as long as you allow yourself to be held hostage by threats and intimidation. Your anger and boundary issues will resolve themselves if you act on the advice your therapist is giving you and evict these parasites.

First, discuss this with a lawyer to see what steps you must take, and because you fear your grandson will become violent, you may need help from the authorities to guarantee your safety from him when he goes. As to your daughter, I predict she'll keep the grandchildren from you only until she needs something - so be prepared. And please, continue talking to your therapist, who seems to have more of your interests at heart than your family members.

DEAR ABBY: My fiance and I have been having food wars with our parents ever since we started dating. Because of our lack of money, we can't move out of our parents' houses yet. My parents fight or yell at me for wanting to eat the kind of food we want to eat. My fiance's mother wants us to never buy our own food and to eat hamburgers and hot dogs every night. She even goes through the trash and yells at my fiance about spending money on food when it's his own money he is spending. How can we keep the peace? So far, we have been eating in the car like nomads. -- WHAT'S EATING US IN OHIO

DEAR WHAT'S EATING: Tolerating your parents' behavior is the price you and your fiance are paying for roofs over your heads until the two of you can save enough for a place of your own. Until that happens, you may have to bide your time and continue "eating in the car like nomads." (I hope you are both eating as healthfully as you can.)

DEAR ABBY: I have had a serious boyfriend for six months. He's wonderful, a dream come true. But I find myself more depressed and suicidal than ever. Mom tells me I don't have any reason to be depressed since I have a boyfriend. It's like she thinks I have no right to be despondent over my twin's death because I now have significant other.

My eating disorder and self-harm have gotten worse, too. I feel like I'm holding in so much sadness I'm not allowed to show that I'm turning it all inward in self-destructive ways. Although I love my boyfriend, I almost feel like breaking up just so everyone won't expect me to be Pollyanna anymore. The third anniversary of my twin's suicide is coming, which is making everything more unbearable. I just don't know what to do. I just want to disappear. - THINGS AREN'T OKAY

DEAR THINGS: If your mother truly believes a death in the family (particularly a twin!) is something that can be "fixed" by having a boyfriend, she is deluding herself. You need professional help and right away. There are support groups for survivors of a family member's suicide, and you are three years overdue for finding one. I urge you to contact the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. PLEASE do not put it off.

Michelle Goldberg, The New York Times

Conservatives have long argued that transgender bathroom policies "would lead to sexual predation" by men in women's clothing, said Michelle Goldberg. So when a Virginia high school student said she'd been sexually assaulted in the girls' room by a boy wearing a skirt, right-wing media seized on the incident as proof that this "culture-war fantasy" had come true. But at a juvenile court hearing last week, the real story emerged. Yes, a 15-year-old girl was assaulted in a girls' bathroom. Her attacker did wear a skirt, as some young, norm-busting males now do, but his mother said he identifies as male, not as transgender. At the time of the attack, the school had no policy allowing trans girls into the girls' bathrooms. The victim knew the boy, and she testified that she'd had sexual activity with the boy twice before in girls' bathrooms and agreed to meet him in a stall in the bathroom again. When she declined his sexual overtures this time, he forced himself on her. This was not, said prosecutor Buta Biberaj, someone "identifying as transgender and going into the girls' bathroom." The truth, unfortunately, will make no difference to people who prefer to believe in "an exquisitely useful lie."

The Week magazine, November 12, 2021