User: ElenaB

Analee, I am not commenting on sexual behavior. I am not saying that somebody is not decent. I do not at all use the word decent. I am not saying that a certain sexual behavior is immoral. I looked up the meaning of the word in question and I commented on the use of the word to label also women who do not sexually behave in a way that is covered by the definition of the word. The definition I quoted says that to be entitled to be labeled as a $%!@ a person has to1) be a woman, 2) have sexual relationships with a lot of men, and 3) having these sexual relationships without any emotional involvement. Neither the dictionary nor I commented on the women who according to the definition are entitled to be called $%!@s by calling them indecent or immoral or anything else. I do not understand how you could be offended by what I wrote about the use of the word in question and other contemptuous words. Moral is a set of standards and norms. What is moral or immoral varies a lot depending on where you are geographically, culturally and which social and religious environment you are in. Moral also changes over time. Indecent is what is offending against the moral. It is possible for a woman to have a sexual behavior that entitles her to be called a $%!@ although her behavior is not offending the moral in her country, social environment, etcetera and therefore does not entitles her to be called indecent.

The Cambridge Dictionary defines the word $%!@ as a woman who has sexual relationships with a lot of men without any emotional involvement

If you are a decent and not promiscuous woman being called a $%!@ involves a terrible and degrading accusation no matter if the word is just used as another invective. Using harsh and degrading words when speaking to other people and calling them insulting names is always marking yourself as an ill-mannered person but immature and stupid people often believe that it makes them seem bigger, stronger and brighter to call those they disagree with or dislike names like $%!@, bitch and bastard. It is and has always been a problem that people use invectives indiscriminately and without caring about the real meaning and value. Then a word like negro that simply is the Latin word for black becomes a degrading word. And think of the Greek word idiot that means a private man = a man who does not care to be involved in politics and the ruling of the state, today it is understood as simply meaning a stupid person. To most people $%!@ is today just a hurtful and degrading word used to express that they dislike a certain female but it does not necessarily have to do with sexual behaviour.

Even if you are a promiscuous woman and if you think it is morally okay for a woman to be promiscuous it is understandable that you are offended by being called a $%!@ when it is not relevant. For instance it is completely irrelevant in an argument about taxes to call you a $%!@. On the other hand you should accept being called a $%!@ when the discussion is about your personal morality and the consequences of it.

‘Females. She is playing. You tell her to be careful not to break anything. She accidently smashes an ornament. "Sorry I didn't mean too." she pouts. What do you do?’

Of course there are situations when a child accidentally and without being at fault does something wrong and then it naturally is not fair to punish the child but in most cases accidents are the result of reckless carelessness and lack of respect for other’s property and work. To teach a child that it is okay for instance to crash things as long as it is not on purpose is very poor parenting. The child should learn that not caring is just as bad and naughty as doing things on purpose. In the situation mentioned in the question the girl’s pouting shows that she believes that she can do whatever she wants as long as she afterwards says, ‘I didn’t mean to’ and ‘I’m sorry’. Her attitude is typical of a spoiled and naughty girl thinking that she is the victim when her careless actions case annoyance and anger.

‘Females. You catch her doing something dangerous that you told her never to do because she could get seriously hurt. "Er....Sorry I forgot. I wont do it again I promise" she says.’ The girl surely did not forget what she had been told but she never learned that she has to take boundaries and instructions seriously.

What the girl mentioned in the two questions needs to learn is the simple fact that being careless and disobedience causes pain. It is simple neglect not to spank her soundly so she learns this fact and begins being careful what she does and to obey instructions she is given. Proper and frequent use of mother’s wooden hairbrush on the girl’s bare bottom would soon teach the girl to care what she is doing and to remember what she has been told and it would also change her whole attitude and make her a both more likable and happier girl. The consistent use of the hairbrush when the girl is naughty will cause much pain and many tears but also show that her mother actually cares what she does and how she behaves. This will in the long run have a very positive effect on the relationship between the girl and her mother.

Physical punishment by a male boss could be sexual harrasment but what you describe is just ordinary discipline. Be glad he punishes you with the ruler instead making deducitions in your pay. Do not try to tell him how to hit you or how in any other way punish you,