User: carg85

Congrats on the front zip sleepers! Did you have to really convince them, or did they already see that it was getting time for you to earn more responsibility? I do hope for your grandmother you'll still wear your new Glaceon costume sometimes though. I'm sure that once you get a bit used to being able to choose what you'll wear to bed, it won't be so bad to sometimes wear one you need help with, since it is your choice then, and it is not like you'll miss being able to take it off in bed.

If you want to try out how it is when your diaper could be noticed, you might try going to a mall further away for some shopping, go to a zoo, or even a museum. (It would be unlikely to encounter other students from your school at a museum, I assume.) It might be good to go with Rosa (and her mom if Rosa can't drive either) to have some company and moral support. I'm sure they'll want to help you getting less sensitive about your handicap.
Then figure out what to wear so that observant people might notice. When you are there, act confident, even when you are not, and watch, or perhaps better: let Rosa watch if she can spot any people who notice. I bet there won't be any, since few people are observant, but if there are see how they react. And don't forget: people might also look at you for other reasons, like positive ones. I think a companion will be better able to judge that than you while you're still so very self-conscious.
By the way, acting confident will by itself already lead to more confidence: mind and body influence each other both ways.

So at the lock-in you brought a back-zip sleeper for the night, which was part of the costume? Did others change out of their costumes for the night? Not all would probably be suitable for sleeping in.

So your grandma has altered 2 of the overalls you already had with the inseam snaps? Or are they new? With the shortalls I assume the crotch opens all the way, so you can even pull them up out of the way. With long overalls I guess the snaps are not all the way to the bottom, so with them diaper changes are not quite as easy?

I'm glad to hear you can also wear your jumpsuits to school now, although you might not consider the pink one that suitable? Did you get compliments on them? They are probably quite different from what you normally wear.

About maturity: I wasn't trying to make it look better to make you feel good, although of course I don't know the full picture, and you now mention several things that don't sound typical for a 17 year old. But I also still hear things that you mention that are because of your handicap and the way your parents deal with it, and not because of (mental) maturity. There is a choice again: if you want to be more mature / bad-$%!@ you need to start working on facing your fears, getting a (Saturday?) job, start helping your mother with cooking, etc. But I think it is OK too if you want to stay more in touch with your inner child, and then you'll have to find a balance where you can be mature and self-reliant if needed, and get cosy in a onesie with your stuffed animals when you don't. And there are enough boys/men about who appreciate a girlish woman and like to get paternal and protective.
I do think that you won't be ready for a relationship until you are more at peace with your handicap; if you are too self-conscious you won't be able to connect and open yourself to the other. (perhaps unless it is another diaper wearer.)

So you got those two-pieces from your grandmother. I always like those kangaroo pouches (like on hoodies). With the tops: can't you reach enough of the buttons / pull down the zipper far enough at the back to pull it over your head? Usually you only need to first 2-3 inches for that. Still, zip and button back shirts, dresses and jumpsuits are in fashion right now (as you found out), so they might actually be more in style (and mature) than front closing ones ;-)

One thing I like less about footed sleepers in bed is that if in bed they ride up a bit, it puts a bit of pressure on my toes and knees, which gets uncomfortable after a while. Do you experience that as well? That should be less of a problem with a footed two-piece set.

I mostly mentioned that the message was delayed because other people might have experienced errors as well, and also a bit to brag about possibly instigating the fix :=D Yes, the visitor numbers are decreasing - I think mostly because of 2 remaining bugs: You don't get emails anymore when you watch polls or messages, and you don't get search results more recent than 2015. I mentioned these once more to the owner, but it seems fruitless. Too bad, since I really like the concept of this site and don't know of others with similar functionality. Earlier I posted my email address in case this site suddenly goes down / disappears. If you would like to continue our conversations then (e.g. with a separate gmail/hotmail account to protect your identity) make sure you have copied it.

Of course this forum is publicly accessible, so even though we seem the only one posting currently, any confessions you make will be read by others too.

I realize you are still quite sensitive about your handicap, but it would improve your life if you weren't. I guess that was what I was trying to say in my previous post. Of course it is easier said than done, but you could try to find ways to desensitize yourself - for instance go to a place where no one knows you (e.g. a mall further away) while dressed in such a way that people might see your diaper (slightly sticking out or from the bulk), and see how people react. And try to keep in mind that it is nothing special, walk proudly and don't look down much. If you don't think it matters, most others will not either. You'll have to fake that at first, but gradually it will become more natural.

About the leg zipper on the costume: you could always explain that it makes bathroom visits easier/possible if people notice and ask.
I really can't judge if it would be advisable to wear it to the lock-in: I just don't know how the time is spent, how the sleeping arrangements are, how much supervision there is, if the lights will be dimmed mostly, etc. ... Wouldn't you need a diaper change while there?

I didn't manage to answer before Halloween, so your question about bringing the key to Rosa is no longer relevant, but since it is not needed to get the suit off, it wouldn't be a big deal not to bring it. And would your mother allow you to bring it anyway? Seems like it would defeat its purpose.

I'm not sure why the link to the overalls pajamas didn't work for you - perhaps they check if the items in the search would be shipped to the US? Anyway, try this link to one specific article (there are a few more types): rabbit overalls PJ's.

Nice to hear the shortalls with snaps operation was a success. For the winter it is not unseen to combine shortalls with tights or leggings: do a google search and you'll also see celebrities like Miley Cyrus and Alexa Chung with that combo. Mostly black tights. That tights or leggings show the bulk of a diaper doesn't matter much if the shortalls (or skirt/dress) on top are wide enough, but you might not have any because of that.

By the way, did the trick with a strong tread on the zipper pull help for you with the back zip jumpsuits?

I feel I can't fully judge your situation, but from what you tell me I see little need for your parents to forbid front zip jammies anymore. It seems to me that the only thing you should still grow in is your sensitivity, like I wrote on above, but for the rest you sound like you are responsible about them. (Of course I don't know if you would fall back to old habits once you regain control, but from what I've seen with other teenagers growing up, a few years make such a big difference that they can hardly imagine anymore why they were doing those immature things earlier.)

So just try to work out a proposal, either ahead of time, of with them, for a trial period where you get the opportunity to make mistakes again, and show yourself and them that you don't anymore. The trick of course is to find the balance between what they would accept and what you'd want to try.

From what you describe what makes you more immature than your classmates: it seems to me that most things you mention are caused by your parents, like drinking alcohol or driving a car, so those are more indicators on how grown up they let you be than how mature you are. (Although of course maturity also comes from learning from your mistakes, and if they don't let you make mistakes...)
The others might either be caused by your sensitivity about your handicap and the lower self-esteem (I assume) because of that, or be a choice. But many women have some childish likes, like with the Harajuku/Lolita/Decora fashion, and I sometimes do a fotoshoot with a 40 year old model who still brings a teddy bear with her anywhere. (And some men still have their toy trains/light sabers/comics,...)

I think you can confess anything to me without me getting angry - apart from serious crimes - because I'm not responsible for you and have no set expectations. At most I might feel disappointed or sad, but in this case what you describe is no more than normal. It seems very natural to me to sometimes get a bit lazy and not try your hardest all the time to go through the hassle of going to the bathroom.
But you do have to choose whether you just accept it and don't bother too much about letting it go, of that you still want to stay dry as long and as often as you can, and then you will need to keep working on it. You might also ask the doctor: as long as there is a chance you might not need diapers during the day if you train enough, it might be worth the effort. In that case you might set yourself some kind of reward if you have managed to always use the bathroom when you can for a day / a week / ..., so that you have an added incentive to keep trying.

I think it would be ideal if you would be really convinced that your diaper wearing is just a tool for a (minor) handicap, no different from needing a wheelchair or glasses. You have already come a long way in accepting them, but you are still quite worried about what other people would think. I do understand that diapers are still more of a taboo than glasses, but people with glasses might also get teased about them.
Realize teasers are the immature ones for not understanding that everybody has or will have physical limitations, and it will be likely they will need diapers at least in the last years of their lives as well. (Women often sooner) If you are really convinced about that, you will not react to their teasing, and then it will soon stop. (Teasing is only worthwhile if it evokes a reaction.) I realize this is likely too much to ask of a teenager, who is at high school constantly surrounded by immature people, but you might try to work towards it anyhow. A first step might be to try and let go of your fear about wearing a diaper beneath your costume: nobody will see it, and even if people would find out you can always say it is because you can't take off the costume easily.

Actually I am not familiar with a church lock-in. Will this be at Halloween, or is it a separate occasion where you are also supposed to be in costume?

About being helpless with your mittens closed: some people might enjoy just being taken care of ;-) If you can't find the second locking zipper pull, you might be able to reuse the first one? Otherwise your parents might also be satisfied if the leg zipper is sewn closed temporarily?

I see what you mean with the waistline of off-the-shelf pajama pants: high waists are not really in fashion currently. (And the pants that are are mostly tight-fitting.) Just for fun: did you know they even make pajamas with overalls bottoms? (e.g. https://www.ebay.co.uk/sch/i.html?_nkw=dungarees+pyjamas)

With the hook-and-eye closures: it will take a bit of tweaking to find the right balance, so let's first see how the snaps work out.

I think the only way forward towards front-zip PJs or even 2-piece, is to sit down with your parents, and see if you can work out a time plan together, taking into consideration that you'll soon be considered an adult and that you might not live with them anymore in a years time. They should allow you the chance to prove to them, and yourself, whether you are responsible enough now to protect your clothes, bed, and furniture against leakage efficiently and all the time. Because that is what should decide what night wear you are allowed, and not whether you got good enough grades, have been disobedient in other ways, etc. I don't mean they should not punish you anymore for infractions, but I think linking punishment to your handicap is not helping you with accepting it, with your self esteem, nor with growth towards independence.
A few posts ago you wrote "I know I'm not really mature enough for the two piece pjs and pajama pants and other stuff that a lot of girls my age wear to bed and that kinda stuff isn't for people who wear diapers anyway." Sometimes I get the feeling you think less of yourself because of your handicap - don't. Of course some clothes are just not practical in combination with a diaper, but if you later, e.g. when not living with your parents anymore, decide that you like sleeping with only a diaper on best - why not?
And if you say "I know I'm not mature enough for ..." - in what way? Do you think you would still succumb to the temptation to remove your diaper or change it to one that wouldn't protect enough?

[By the way. this message was delayed because MisterPoll gave errors when posting. After I mailed the owner it worked again.]

Nice that you got your Halloween costume - with plenty of time left. Will you only be wearing it inside on Halloween, or do you also go out? It sounds like a lot of effort put into the costume if hardly anyone else sees it.
With costumes I think the zipper is almost always at the back to not 'mar' the front. I bet a lot of people get into bladder trouble - probably you'll be far from the only one to wear protection underneath.
If you wear them as pajamas, won't the costume parts get in the way, like feeling the tail if you lie on your back, or if the feet are large, or with the stuffed belly?
So if the mittens are buttoned closed, you're pretty helpless? Perhaps that is the solution for wearing it overnight at Rosa's? If your hands are disabled, you can't operate the leg zipper, so no risk of you interfering with your diaper. You might also considering using the second locking zipper pull if the zipper is wide enough (5 mm), but that pull is rather big and can be noisy, so it might draw attention to the leg zipper.
You mentioned you usually don't have both paws buttoned, so sometimes you do?
You say a leg zipper isn't allowed when staying over at Rosa's - but is it allowed at home then? Or can't you use either Halloween costume as PJs at all? In that case you grandmother moving the zipper to the back sounds unnecessary.
I'd really like to see a picture of it (e.g. while you are not wearing it for privacy), if you have a way of posting a picture.

I'm not sure why you would want your grandmother to make you clothes that would be easy to buy too - pajama or sweat pants or shirts should be widely available. Wouldn't it be best to 'save' her efforts for special wishes and adaptations?

Good thing you talked to your parents about your aunt - it is not really complaining behind her back, since you tried talking to her first and she wouldn't let you. If she is mad about it anyway, that is too bad, but would not be fair. But people are not always fair, so it could happen. It probably also depends on how your parents talk to her about it: if she feels blamed or just given tips. Still I think it was important to stand up to her (indirectly in this case) treating you that way.

I can see what you mean about the pink jumpsuit with the flared sleeves: the sleeves make it somewhat fancier, but the rest of the suit is more casual. Perhaps ideal for a fantasy convention or renaissance fair? ;-) But it does draw attention, and being asked where you got it is something of a compliment, which is always nice ')
Many webshops like Asos add new clothes to their assortment all the time, so perhaps just look again if you feel you need something or can convince your father again to spend more; If the peplum one isn't ideal there will be others. And of course there are loads of other webshops too.

Yes, hook-and-eye closures normally tend to open when there is no tension on the fabric, so that is why I wrote that you need ones that have a bit of resistance opening, like with a small bump:

You can bend the hook part down a bit further to make even more unlikely that it will open by itself. (Of course that makes it a bit harder if you want to open it...)
And if it is too cold to wear shortalls once you get the version with the snaps back, couldn't you just wear them with tights or leggings?

Sometimes you can see what people do wrong / how they can improve their lives / ..., like with Bobby, and it can be frustrating if they won't listen. But it is their life and sometimes there is nothing you can do. I have given flute lessons, and sometimes a student just isn't ready for some advice, and then later they suddenly are, and I tend to feel like: I already told you that 6 months ago. But that is just human nature, and sometimes the situation needs to be right for them to make sense of the suggestion. (And of course there is always a chance that your advice seems obvious and right to you, but won't work for their situation.) With Bobby we won't care overmuch, but if it is someone close to you who is causing him/herself harm, it can be hard and you can feel pretty helpless.

About you being mature enough for front zipper sleepers in bed, I can't say for definite, but here are some ideas about it:
- If I'm right you will be 18 then, so adult in a number of ways. (Also depends on the state I believe.) In principle you could say you can decide for yourself then, but as long as you live with them they can still set rules.
- In less then a year you will go to college, and if you do decide to join a dorm you will suddenly be responsible for everything yourself, so I think it might be time to start building experience with deciding things for yourself and living with the consequences.
- When is the last time you wet on clothes/bed/furniture for not wearing protection when you should have? Was that incident at Rosa's the last time? From your posts I get the impression that lately you have fully accepted that you need to wear protection, so it seems like there is no more need to prevent you from accessing your diaper, but of course you might not mention everything. Apparently you still take off diapers without permission - did you confess afterward and explain why it was necessary? (Owning up to your mistakes is a sign of maturity, although one I think many people fail. Still I think your parents will take it as such, so it will be a lot less harmful for their opinion of you than if they discover it by themselves.)

About the onesies that look like a blouse: I had trouble finding some examples of what I had in mind, but looking for bodysuit blouse gave more hits, like https://molly-dress.com/shirts/shirts_long_sleeve/collared_white_shirt_bodysuit_with_front_button_fastening.html
I also found some vintage examples of what I meant: https://www.etsy.com/listing/241745697/vintage-snap-up-denim-bodysuit-80s-90s?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=onesie%20blouse&ref=sr_gallery_33
and https://www.etsy.com/listing/545035601/vintage-70s-bodysuit-blouse-red-$%!@?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=onesie%20blouse&ref=sr_gallery_7
Not sure though how useful those would be for you, since the bottom part seems pretty close-fitting, so it might not offer too much extra space.

You mentioned a onesie with buttons at the back - those are usually harder to undo than a back zipper. Do you need help with that one?

I was not worried that you might be mad about my clothing tips - just unsure if it would be helpful.

About the peplum jumpsuit: I'm no expert, so you might want to check with someone else (like Rosa) if they'd think it would help hide or draw attention.
Now you have some more opportunity to wear the jumpsuits - do you enjoy them as much as you expected?

When you shop at Asos, look for the selection criteria at the left, and you'll find the petite selection at the 'Range' section. And when you browse through all of them, the petite ones will also be marked with "asos petite" at the bottom of the picture.

With operating the zipper yourself, there is a way to make it easier: your could get a sturdy thread in the right color and tie it to the zipper pull in the middle. That way you can pull at the end(s) of the thread to open and close the zipper. If you don't want it to draw attention, you could push the tread to the inside when not using it. Try it for a while at home, to make sure the thread doesn't break ;-)
You could also make a pull cord that you keep separately, with e.g. a paperclip on the end that you push through the small hole in the zipper pull when you want to (un)dress. They are also commercially available, like: https://www.magnamail.com.au/product/back-zipper-helper.html (or https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/msdressup/zipper-pull).

Were people around you surprised that you chose back zip jumpsuits, since you used to hate your back zip PJs so?

Have you discussed some of your aunt's quirks with your mother? Perhaps she can explain to her some of the things she trusts you with, and e.g. checking the incontinence material without even warning you is just not OK on anybody above 2. And I can't think of a reason why you'd want to lie about being wet: a dry diaper seems preferable to a soggy and thick mass between your legs.

With the inseam of the shortalls you might also consider hook-and-eye closures: those are quite small and flat. I believe they hardly make bodysuits anymore with those in the crotch instead of snaps, since it was easy to get your skin pinched, but with shortalls that should not be a problem. They might be a bit fiddly though, and you need ones that have a bit of resistance opening, because there is no tension on the fabric to keep them closed.

Seems like Bobby has gotten bored with us ;-) I hope our answers haven't scared him away, but if he is not serious about putting the effort in we can't really help him anyway.